Love Letters
Reflections on Identity, Acceptance, the Freedom to Be, and a Love Beyond Labels
Violet and Vita
“I am in the act of asking myself if I ought to reply to your question? A question furthermore most indiscreet and which merits a sharp reprimand. Reply, don’t reply, reply! Oh to the devil with discretion!
Well, you ask me pointblank why I love you… I love you, because I’ve fought so hard to win you… I love you, because you never gave me back my ring. I love you because you have never yielded in anything; I love you because you never capitulate. I love you for your wonderful intelligence, for your literary aspirations, for your unconscious (?) coquetry. I love you because you have the air of doubting nothing! I love in you what is also in me: imagination, the gift for languages, taste, intuition and a host of other things…
I love you, because I have seen your soul…”
Well, this is a letter between two lovers. Now, read it again and tell me if you can see who the two people are. A man and a woman? Two men? Two women?
When I went through the snippets of the letters in the article aforementioned, I felt that they were profound, passionate, beautiful and intense. It is only after going through the letters in their entirety, I realized that they were between two women. Love is love nevertheless. Isn’t it? Besides, if we just get to read a conversation between two lovers without knowing who the two are, would we know if it’s between two men, two women or between a man and a woman? We would only know the nature of love, whether it’s Platonic, Storge, Philia, Eros or Agape.
Love is beyond the ordinances that “we” created. But sadly in an attempt to be a part of this “we”, understand and confirm to gender stereotypes, for decades many had to hide behind the invisible walls that we created, hide behind their masked identities, gasping for breath, trying to break free from the shackles of our norms, prejudices and just struggling to be.
Having said that, identity crisis is not the only implication here. According to comprehensive data published by the Australian Bureau of Statistics (ABS), 58.7% of LGB+ Australians and 80.4% of non-binary Australians met the diagnostic criteria for a mental disorder and experienced symptoms within the last 12 months. By comparison, only 20% of heterosexual individuals in the general Australian population met the criteria within the same period.
Monash University researchers highlight significant disparities, noting 41.3% of cisgender non-heterosexual and 27.2% of transgender Australians face high or very high psychological distress, versus 15.5% of cisgender heterosexual individuals. Overall, LGBTQ+ Australians are three times more likely to experience mental health disorders.
Vulnerabilities are particularly acute among younger demographics, with 79.6% of non-binary individuals reporting lifetime suicidal thoughts, and Australian Institute of Health and Welfare (AIHW) data showing up to 91% of trans men facing lifetime suicidal ideation. Furthermore, 11.8% of LGB adults lack family support during crises, double the 5.9% rate for heterosexual adults.
Can you see the glaring disparity in how we, as a society, function? These statistics are a stark reflection of our ethos. It is time we changed this. It is time we put an end to the systematic subjugation of true identity and freedom through labels and stereotypes. It is time we put an end to the notion of “coming out of the closet” and let everyone take pride in who they are. Let everyone just be, for everyone has the right to celebrate their true identity, even if we don’t identify with them. It is time we stop discriminating, rise above our differences, break the glass ceiling, embrace diversity and inclusion, celebrate infinite, boundless love, and live and let live!
